gramma

OMG, I have gramma's boobs. Well, now I know. That however was not what I was planning on writing about. Gramma is the reason that I am sane. She was the ray of sunshine in my childhood. I know we all like to remember our childhood as nothing other than hell, but sometimes it really is more hell than not hell. I tend to minimize the impact of my childhood on my long term mental health, and I tend to down play just how frakked it was, but every now and again I am reminded that I am lucky to be as stable as I am. Most recently my therapist and I were chatting about my pending career in the mental health field and she emphasized that I wasn't going to run into too many single individuals that had experienced all of the things that I had, and that it would be an asset to me in working with others who also have a whacko background.

Back to gramma, I was just looking back at my childhood trying to identify the good times. Being with her was pretty much the only time I felt safe and felt loved. I've probably written about her before, but it is important for me to remember her and remember that there were moments that things were ok.

Gramma and her siblings were all put up for adoption in the early 1900's. She married my grandfather and raised 5 kids practically on her own during the depression while grandpa traveled the state getting what work he could. She homesteaded the badlands of ND, which let me assure you were harsh. Rattlesnakes, 8-9 month winters complete with several feet of snow, and winds that blew nearly all year long. There are many stories of homesteaders going crazy from the winds alone, but not her. She was a spit fire who always had a smile on her face, and she worked just as hard if not harder than any man, but she was never bitter or resentful, and in spite of all her hardships she remained a loving, joyful woman. I've probably mentioned this as well, but what the hell. Dad always used to say of the 4'2" fireball that "gramma could pick a grown man up, turn him upside down and drop him on his head." And I'm sure she could.

So, to answer Jeremy's question; my grandmother is my hero and that is why.