to be strong

Needing to find some balance with my body.

Was just kinda feeling like I was getting a little stronger...and a little more in touch with my body.
And then I got sick. Spent 3 days in bed, and have ups and downs for this last week and a half.
Went to PT Monday and had to slow things down cuz I could tell my blood pressure was really low.
(Under 100 I told her)
The next day, feeling sliiiightly better my BP was 98/60 at my doc's office. (Let me assure you that when BP is under 100 it's hard to function mentally or physically)
Being in bed so much has really stiffened up the hip, and I can see my little muscles wasting away.

So, here I am in a state of frustration...wanting to get stronger, but on the verge of passing out and bronchitis if I get active.

So then I can ask myself what it means to be strong...what is so important about that...and IS it that important.
Being strong means...feeling strong...mentally, physically, emotionally. I'll be honest, I haven't been feeling strong in any of those areas for some time, and being physically strong again would help all 3.
Being strong means...being able to take care of myself. Which I guess I can do without big muscles.
Being strong means...being confident and feeling good about myself. The truth is that I've lost a lot of the activities in my life that make me feel confident and good about myself...many of those things were physical in nature. This has been a long battle...this trying to find non-physical things I can be passionate about. Guess I need to get to work.