poverty mind...again

Ever have one of those days when you feel like everything you touch turns to sh*t? I certainly had a mega-sh*t day. I "know" it wasn't a total disaster, but it feels like it...the feeling is stronger than the knowledge. I "know" this was fired up by my Poverty Mind...today I had to make a payment for braces...f'ing braces at 45. Throw a flat tire on top of that to start the day, and I emotionally couldn't adult today.

I grew up hearing "we can't afford that." That was my mother's answer to everything. 

Can I have a toothbrush?
Can I go to a concert?
Can I go to the dentist (BEFORE I have an abscessed tooth)?
I think I broke my ankle, can I go to the Dr?

Can we get some bananas?

Nope. But mom can have her cigarettes, and dad can have his booze. 

Message: You aren't worth anything...in fact you are a burden.

And that's where my head is today. I know better...dang it, I know better. 

Maybe tomorrow I will know better, and feel better.